you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Bring me that man meat
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
