We need to start having sex underwater more often.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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