At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i would punch a child for taco bell
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Best friends brother. Beat that.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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