But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
