Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
