Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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