I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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