seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
