Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
