do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
