is your mom at the bar?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
