going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
