marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
