That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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