she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
