i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
i think im in europe. pls send help
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
