I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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