you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
