Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
