If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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