you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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