Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
