i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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