I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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