I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
