do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
