I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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