I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
