I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
