She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
