Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
