well I can't set my house on fire every night
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
