who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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