i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize