i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
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