last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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