You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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