Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
