i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
my sisters under your porch take her home
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I would ride that face into the sunset
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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