I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
