he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
