so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
