lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I fill condoms, not promises.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
