Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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