he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize