that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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