She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
