If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Randomize