Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.

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(254): View more from Texas

Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.

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(720): View more from Colorado

For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)

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(604): View more from British Columbia

Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.

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(937): View more from Ohio

she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks

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(678): View more from Georgia

The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.

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