I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
